I have been exploring how we navigate fear in our lives, it will form part of the next Mighty Heart Facilitator Course (starting 25th February 2026 https://mightyheart.co.uk/) and I’d like to share my thoughts with you and hope they resonate.
Fear creeps up, it creeps into our very system, it grips us.
Being nervous or afraid makes us do odd things. Fear makes us lose connection with other people. It shuts off our compassion, so that we canât feel – we can hardly even see – another person. This is what makes it possible for a fearful and angry person to hurt another person, even a person they are fond of.
So we need clarity – a bit of distance from the grip of fear. And the fastest and most reliable route to clarity does not lie in âthinking it throughâ or âmaking a planâ. In fact, the fastest route to clarity is not in your brain; itâs in your breath.
When I am anxious or fearful I try to take myself to a place that feels safe and ask âHow does this feel?â, âHow am I feeling?â. I take 10 deep breaths slowly in and slowly out (slow is vital here).
Itâs a simple but profound technique and I urge you try it. Surprisingly, you will feel quite different, because your nervous system has relaxed. Your centre of gravity is much lower. You can think more clearly, and youâre more in touch with your heart.
As your system calms, you can start to identify what is true and what is not. One thing I have learned is that fear lies – whatever you are afraid of is very seldom what will happen.
Identifying the lie means you feel less afraid. Because you now know that most of your fear is baseless. It also means you can start to consult your heart as to the best way to deal with the situation.
By doing this you can access your own clarity, clarity in your very centre, clarity in your heart as well as your mind. And your heart, if you ask it, is not afraid. Your heart is aware of your ability, your integrity, your common sense. And your wisdom.
We live in a world where fear is dominating so many lives, and being used as a tool of oppression and control. Throughout my work I have been inspired by extraordinary courageous people, people who have accessed this incredible power of their hearts, and over and again taken a stand against what they have feared.
My invitation is to start with the fears that are holding you back today and start with your breath. Have the courage to voice your fears to a trusted friend (and in doing so maybe overcome a fear of vulnerability). Take the 10 conscious breaths (slowly, at least twice) and report how you feel about your fear. Then, ask for feedback from your friend on whether you sounded different, looked different, stood differently.
Then itâs your friendâs turn.
As you practice this it will give you the courage to stand up against whatever it is you are afraid of and say âNo! It’s wrong! I won’t! I refuse!â This is the strongest antidote to fear.